He's North of 50, bald, wears glasses, and has been visibly ill for months. But Christopher Hill just negotiated a treaty with North Korea, was called 'Boyish' by the likes of CNN, and is a national heartthrob in at least 3 Asian countries.

I really don't know how to put this, but uh, i think I'm actually the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby. I know what you're thinking... 'There goes Adam, just another gold digger like Larry Birkhead or Howard K Stern, men claiming to be the father of an illigimit child just to collect a huge payday.'

But to all that I say NAY! I am not a gold digger like these men at all. I'm much more of a 'Prince Frederick von Anhalt' gold digger. That's right, Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband. You see, here's a gold digger who knows how to do it. The man married Zsa Zsa Gabor when he was 39 and she was 70 (her 8th husband)! When he heard that there was money to be dug from Anna Nicole, he jumped on that bandwagon too.

And just like the Prince, I'm also doing so days after the woman's death. Classy, huh?

Isn't alcohol great? You can blame it on just about anything: Your affairs, your pedophilia, your anti-semitism, your late-night, gotta-have-a-burger cravings, your very Un-Miss USA Behavior, and on and on.